Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
