if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
