it wasn't lemon gatorade
No stitches, just platelets and will power
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
