I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
