I could make wine with my vomit
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
