we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
