Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
