O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
