Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
