There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
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