We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Randomize
