What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
