We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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