Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
