capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize