well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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