I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
