Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
