And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
