Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I think your dad took our porno
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize