I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
