Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
