He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
