just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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