OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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