So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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