So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
