also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize