We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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