his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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