Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
