Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
