his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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