I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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