Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My breasts were aching with rage.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
