He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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