D3 body, D1 cock
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
