Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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