I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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