is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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