We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
