I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
