your thong is hanging out like whoa
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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