great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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