had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
So squirting runs in the family.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Send help, water and tortillas.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
