I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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