but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
