At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Two words: blizzard sex
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
