i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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