To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
