Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
