no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
